2019 saw the release of “big news” that Motley Crue was reuniting to do a stadium tour in 2020 with Def Leppard and Poison. Yes, this is “big news,” I guess. In 2015, Motley Crue signed a cessation of touring contract in an overdramatic press conference. In a nutshell, Motley Crue staged a huge event out of signing a contract stating that they will no longer tour. Who was this supposed contract for? Can you sign a contract saying you’ll never tour again? Why not just shut the fuck up and bow out gracefully? Probably because there is nothing graceful about Motley Crue.
Like most people like me who grew up in the ‘80s and ‘90s, I fell into the smoke and mirrors trap of Motley Crue. They looked cool, they had larger than life stage shows, and at the time I thought they were making great music. The older I got, and the more I was exposed to truly great music the more I was able to see through the smoke and mirrors to see a subpar band of very little artistic substance.
Motley Crue was never about the quality of music or songwriting. They were all about the huge arena stage productions, costumes, and, most of all, the attitude. Motley Crue embodied everything about the sleazy, grimy, Hollywood attitude. They were rock n’ roll, but they weren’t good. As a kid, I fell for the sham and swore by Motley Crue, but as the years passed, my musical pallet would expand, and I would see how banal and insipid the music of Motley Crue was. With lyrics like “touch my gun but don’t pull my trigger, let’s make history in the elevator” Sixx definitely isn’t the next Bob Dylan.
In 1992, Vince Neil quit/was fired from the band, and after the public announcement, Crue fans wondered what would become the band. It was announced that The Scream vocalist John Corabi would be stepping in and taking over vocal duties and playing rhythm guitar. Motley Crue released their self-titled debut (also referred to as ’94) to critical acclaim but was a commercial flop. The ’94 album boasted a mature and more focused band as opposed to the corny, eye-rolling tongue in cheek material presented on their previous albums. The music and the lyrics were dark, well written, and perfectly executed.
The ’94 album showcased Motley Crue’s ability actually to be able to be a surprisingly great band and they backed it up with a sadly underrated tour. The show was amazing, and I was so surprised at how great they were. It was so cool to see Motley Crue do away with all of the theatrics and distractions and prove that if they really put their mind to it that they could be a truly great band.
Nikki Sixx, after the failure of the ’94 album and tour, went running back to Vince Neil, who would continue to put on horrible live performances and make shitty records for the next 19 years or so. For just a few short years, Motley Crue was actually a band that had some creative, artistic credibility and just like that went back to being the mediocre (at least) band.
Why is it necessary or even a big deal to have a Motley Crue reunion and tour? I just don’t get it. Vince Neil has never been a good singer live and can only squeeze out enough air to sing every fourth word, Mick Mars can barely stand up on his own looking more like Bernie from Weekend at Bernie’s, Nikki Sixx just looks and acts like a jackass, and Tommy Lee is just happy to be there. Their performances are sloppy and painful to listen to. Even the deafest of animals are screaming in agonizing pain somewhere in the forests because of Vince Neil’s bloated screeching.
Even though I’ve said this many times throughout this writing, I call it smoke and mirrors. Motley Crue fans are happy to be caught up in nostalgia. They are more than content reliving their glory days as young people partying in their parent’s basement while listening to “Smokin’ in the Boys Room” or getting laid to “Home Sweet Home.” If this is good enough for the average Motley Crue fan, then more power to them. For those of us who prefer quality, I’d rather that this shit and the people that are excited about it stay underneath the rug where I swept them.
Have fun with this:
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